Friday, December 15, 2006

The gayest, straightest, sexiest - or just the most boring cars

There was somewhere a few days ago something about the most sexiest, straightest and gayest cars in the net. I had to rush so I forgot where I saw it so I tried to search it again...
So I found different versions.
You'd think they have something in common.

About-site's gay section lists these as the gayest cars of the year:
1) 2006 BMW 5 Series Sedan
2) 2006 Saab 9-5 Wagon
3) 2006 Kia Sorento
and lists after these in the top ten also 2006 Chevrolet Impala, 2006 Mini Cooper, 2006 Honda Element, 2006 Chrysler 300C, 2006 Pontiac G6, 2006 Subaru Outback (for the lesbian moving van), and the budget queeriest car, 2006 Ford Focus.

Straight sites name the gay cars a lot different. Finally I found the site I had seen the article too, gizmodo.
Personalbee and gizmodo both take the results of wheels24. So, the straight rich car magazine reading people in New Zealand think that these cars are gay:
1. Peugeot 207 (pictured above): 7155
2. BMW 3 Series Coupe: 3378
3. Jaguar XK: 2571
4. Honda Civic Hatch: 1776
5. Alfa Romeo 159: 1293
which, if we compare the list to what the gay review site had concluded shows NONE of the "gay" matches be the same. Maybe in this second list the gay was used as a synonym for not very nice design instead.

This wheels24 voted these as the most straight cars:
1. Audi RS4 (pictured above): 9824
2. Toyota Fortuner: 2629
3. Dodge Caliber: 1808
4. VW Jetta: 979
5. Lexus IS250: 936

And the sexiest rear-end votes:
1. Alfa Brera (pictured above): 6608
2. BMW Z4 Coupe: 5722
3. Opel Astra GTC: 2270
4. Renault Clio: 1071
5. Nissan Tiida: 505

There is something just plain wrong with these results.
First - there are no sexy cars in the sexy cars list. If they want to go voting for not so budget cars, why limit the results with any budget? Top sexiest cars rear-end list that doesn't contain Lamborghini Diablo, any Ferrari, old Fiat Cinquecento, Cadillacs from 1970s among others is just plain wrong.

Second - all these cars in the gayest and sexiest list of wheels24 are average looking. The straightest cars list is way boring - hopefully no one will boost their family valueness or straightness facade by choosing a car voted straight from the list. Volkswagen, Dodge, Toyota, Lexus.. meh. I would choose gladly any non-straight car over those.

Third - I could not vote for the gay cars since my gaydar isn't on the wave length of cars. Gay car would have to not look like a family car, and sure be with style and elegance. And it's not what you have but how you use it.. On my version of the straight cars list there would have to be SUVs, just because I can't imagine any gay driving a SUV ... so I leave my votes open.

What would your version of the gayest, straightest, and sexiest cars be? Please tell.


sellsius said...

And where's the Veyron? It should count for sexy just by being the fastest & most expensive car you can buy. And it looks pretty good from the back end as well :)

Anna said...

Hmmm... yea good point. :)
I think anything costing as much as Ferraris would score high on the list, unless they for some reason manage to be ugly or look like plain any SUVs ...